Funny Things about Indian Tax Structure

TAX STRUCTURE IN INDIA
1) Que.: What are you doing?
Ans.: Business.
Tax: PAY PROFESSIONAL TAX!
2) Que.: What are you doing in Business?
Ans.: Selling the Goods.
Tax: PAY SALES TAX!!
3) Que.: From where are you getting Goods?
Ans.: From other State/Abroad
Tax: PAY CENTRAL SALES TAX, CUSTOM DUTY & OCTROI!
4) Que.: What are you getting in Selling Goods?
Ans.: Profit.
Tax: PAY INCOME TAX!
5) Que.: How do you distribute profit?
Ans: By way of dividend
Tax: Pay dividend distribution Tax
6) Que.: Where you Manufacturing the Goods?
Ans.: Factory.
Tax: PAY EXCISE DUTY!
7) Que.: Do you have Office / Warehouse/ Factory?
Ans.: Yes
Tax: PAY MUNICIPAL & FIRE TAX!
8) Que.: Do you have Staff?
Ans.: Yes
Tax: PAY STAFF PROFESSIONAL TAX!
9) Que.: Doing business in Millions?
Ans.: Yes
Tax: PAY TURNOVER TAX!
Ans: No
Tax: Then pay Minimum Alternate Tax
10) Que. : Are you taking out over 25,000 Cash from Bank?
Ans.: Yes, for Salary.
Tax: PAY CASH HANDLING TAX!
11) Que.: Where are you taking your client for Lunch & Dinner?
Ans.: Hotel
Tax: PAY FOOD & ENTERTAINMENT TAX!
12) Que.: Are you going Out of Station for Business?
Ans.: Yes
Tax: PAY FRINGE BENEFIT TAX!
13) Que.: Have you taken or given any Service/s?
Ans.: Yes
Tax: PAY SERVICE TAX!
14) Que.: How come you got such a Big Amount?
Ans.: Gift on birthday.
Tax: PAY GIFT TAX!
15) Que.: Do you have any Wealth?
Ans.: Yes
Tax: PAY WEALTH TAX!
16) Que.: To reduce Tension, for entertainment, where are you going?
Ans.: Cinema or Resort.
Tax: PAY ENTERTAINMENT TAX!
17) Que.: Have you purchased House?
Ans.: Yes
Tax: PAY STAMP DUTY & REGISTRATION FEE !
18) Que.: How you Travel?
Ans.: Bus
Tax: PAY SURCHARGE!
19) Que.: Any Additional Tax?
Ans. : Yes
Tax: PAY EDUCATIONAL, ADDITIONAL EDUCATIONAL & SURCHARGE ON ALL THE CENTRAL GOVT.'s TAX !!!
20) Que.: Delayed any time paying Any Tax?
Ans.: Yes
Tax: PAY INTEREST & PENALTY!
21) INDIAN: Can I Die Now??
Ans: Wait we are about to launch the funeral tax!!!

Wanna Die?? Pay Tax!

There is a reason with every episode

Once two friends planned to build a house for them. They arranged for finance etc and made it. Their new house was beautifully finished.
They fixed up a date for the “NEW HOUSE FUNCTION /CEREMONY”. All arrangements were on and they were excited as they approached the day.
The day just before the ceremony, a terrible shock was awaiting all. The house caught fire and entirely damaged. The people of the village approached one among the friends to say that bad news.
“Ur house destroyed in fire “Screamed the people. The person got shocked and instantly died on the spot. The people were curious to see what would happen to the other one.
They rushed up to him. This time they added much shock and terribleness and informed him that his house got fired and everything has destroyed. Before they were about to inform his friend’s death he rushed to the stall near by and returned there.
To everyone’s surprise he distributed sweets to all happily. People decided to take up an admission for him in the mental hospital nearby. They tried to put him down the happiness and asked him the reason for distributing sweets.
He replied’ had the house caught fire a day late! I would be no more alive. God loves me and have saved me. “Everything happens but for a reason”

Laughing Mall

Once upon a time there was a shepherd looking after his sheep on the side of a deserted road. Suddenly a brand new Porsche screeches to a halt. The driver, a man dressed in an Armani suit, Cerutti shoes, Ray-Ban sunglasses, TAG-Heuer wrist-watch, and a Pierre Cardin tie gets out and asks the shepherd, 'If I can tell you how many sheep you have, will you give me one of them?' The shepherd looks at the young man, then looks at the large flock of grazing sheep and replies, 'Okay.' The young man parks the car, connects his laptop to the mobile-fax, enters a NASA Website, scans the ground using his GPS,opens a database and 60 Excel tables filled with algorithms and pivot tables. He then prints out a 150-page report on his high-tech mini-printer, turns to the shepherd and says, 'You have exactly 1,586 sheep.' The shepherd cheers, 'That's correct, you can have your sheep.' The young man takes one of the animals from the flock and puts it in the back of his Porsche. The shepherd looks at him and asks, 'If I guess your profession, will you return my animal to me?' The young man answers, 'Yes, why not?' The shepherd says, 'you are an auditor.’ 'How did you know?' asks the young man. 'Very simple,' answers the shepherd. ‘Firstly, you came here without being wanted. Secondly, you charged me a fee to tell me something I already knew.. Thirdly, you don't understand anything about my business... '.....Now Can I have my dog back?'